The first thing she shared was that she sees traits in me that I only have because of the experiences I have had in my life. She said I have unique insight and compassion because of the things God has brought me to and through. She feels that I am going to make a fantastic counselor one day. Well, I was both shocked and flattered that she felt this way. She also said she feels encouraged by my life story and hearing me talk about how far God has brought me. It was so nice to hear her say that I have done a wonderful job in processing my feelings about what God is doing in my life. I told her that I felt inadequate and uncertain about what I am called to do. I told her I thought Satan was not out necessarily to keep me from God, but to keep me from helping other hurting people. She told me to hang on, to be confident that God began a good work in me and that He will carry it on to completion. To just KEEP WALKING IN HIM, one step at a time. Just like I had to depend on God when I was dealing with those deep, dark places in my life, I have to depend on Him to light each step when times are good, too. God will not leave me and He will not lead me astray, He will guide me to the exact place He intends for me to be.
I was encouraged, and this evening I feel very strongly about the other thing we talked about...
My therapist and I also talked extensively about my plans to have another tattoo done on my foot. Now, I won't share all the details of this tattoo....you have to wait for the pictures. But, I will tell you it has a butterfly in the design. She asked me if I knew that a caterpillar and a butterfly have the same DNA. (Huh? What? I did not know that!!) Yes, it seems that it is true. Their DNA is the same....exactly. The caterpillar goes through metamorphosis and when this happens, certain genetic codes are "turned on" to allow growth and change to take place. Before the caterpillar becomes a butterfly, it's DNA becomes a kind of DNA soup. It loses it's structure entirely and has to hang on believing that something good can come of the mess it is in. That poor caterpillar just sits there waiting on something beautiful to happen. After metamorphosis is complete and the butterfly is fully formed, it still has the same DNA as when it began life. The only difference is that the butterfly is now "grown up" into a beautiful creature.
Made me think about how God has grown me over the years. Made me think about all the things I have "survived" over the years. And...it made me think about how that little butterfly on my foot will be a permanent stamp of the changes I have gone through.
That butterfly on my foot is the symbol of my testimony. My heart. My life story.
